Emotional Benefits of A Media Fast: Part 3

Once you’ve begun your media fast and have  started to work with your core beliefs around your personal finances, there are two more things you can do to keep your emotional state in alignment with what you want to create.  The first is to commit to a daily practice of possibility thinking.  One thing that the media loves to do is to milk all of the doom and gloom like the tabloids.  Have you ever noticed how the media focuses on the problem and why, as a result of the problem, things aren’t possible?  The media never seems to examine why the financial crisis is a good thing; they rarely look at the crumbling of our economic system as an opportunity for positive change.  

What if  it was possible for those of us going through the hardships right now of financial instability due to any number of reasons including unemployment, the stock market crash or loss of a spouses income, could see opportunity for something new?  There must be a breakdown of an old system, an old paradigm or way of being, before transformation can occur.  Could it be that the financial crisis is giving millions of people the opportunity to shift into a way of being that provides more stability, sustainability and most importantly, happiness than our currently crumbling paradigm of ‘work hard, make lots of money, buy lots of stuff, die unfulfilled ‘ ? 

A good friend of mine gave me great perspective.  He said, “You may not have much money right now, but what you do have is time… and you can do a lot with that! ”  That’s possibility thinking.  As the saying goes, make lemonade out of lemons.  I’m choosing to spend this time that I normally wouldn’t have to focus on doing things for my business like list building and learning how to be more fluent with using social media.  What new opportunities are possible for you right now despite your situation (or better yet, because of your situation)?  

Finally, it’s important to find the time each day to express gratitude .  I’ve talked about this before, and find it such a fundamental component to happiness and fulfillment that I can’t say it enough… gratitude has the ability to shift your emotional state in an instant.  After all, true happiness comes from our inner state of being, not from our financial situation, our possessions, or our love life.   But you already know this so, need I say more?

Lisa Engles uses several integrative healing techniques in her work as a certified life coach including EFT, music therapy and movement based healing arts.  She has a degree in Exercise Physiology and Kinesiolgy, and has spent many years in personal study of  consciousness and the new sciences.  She is available for private coaching as well as corporate presentations, workshops and seminars.  Email lisa@innerstatecoaching.com for more information.

Emotional Benefits Of A Media Fast: Part 2

 Now that you’ve committed to your media fast, how can you make the most of it?  One thing that I’ve learned in my work with coaching hundreds of people to overcome blocks is that behavior modification rarely works.  Why?  Because modifying a behavior is to treat the symptom (the behavior) and not the cause.  So, to just give up watching the news, listening to news radio or reading the paper will probably not have lasting effects on your emotional health unless you address the deeper cause of the fear, stress, overwhelm and anxiety you’re experiencing.

During your media fast, you must begin to question the thoughts and beliefs that are associated with undesired emotional states.  It’s actually quite simple, here’s how it works:

When you have a thought that’s related to your personal finances or the economy that makes you feel anxious, nervous, depressed or any other negative feeling ask yourself this question:  What meaning have I created about myself  in relation to this thought/belief? OR What does this mean about ME?

Here’s an example.  Perhaps you catch yourself thinking, “ I can’t pay my bills this month, what am I going to do?”  Simply notice the thought and then ask yourself: What does it mean about me (not what does it mean) that I can’t pay my bills?  You might have several answers: I’m not a good wife/husband because I’m not contributing; I’m a failure; I’m not worthy or deserving.  Notice the difference between ‘What does it mean about me’, versus ‘What does it mean’?  If you were to answer the latter question the answer would be very different: “I might get kicked out of my apartment’, ‘ The debt collectors will come after me’, ‘My utilities will get shut off’. You want to get to what you believe about yourself in relation to your situation, not what you imagine will happen to you in your life.

With this line of questioning you’re trying to discover what core beliefs you have that could be blocking you and keeping you stuck.  Once you have an awareness about a limiting belief, you can choose to replace it with a more empowering thought by asking yourself: What thought would be more empowering right now?  For instance, instead of continuing to dwell on the thought “I can’t pay my bills”, you might choose another thought that shifts your emotional state such as ‘I’m doing everything I can to resolve this.’ or ‘I contribute to my family in many ways, not just with money.’  or  ‘ This is an opportunity for me to find new ways to create abundance that I may never have thought of.’  You can choose any thought that focuses on possibility and that take you further away from the stress and anxiety and closer to feelings of peace and a sense of detachment.  It may take some time to find a thought that makes you feel more empowered than your original thought, but the more you practice the easier it becomes.

Working with your core beliefs will have the greatest effect on your emotional state, so this is a critical piece of the 40-day media fast process.  In my next posting, I’ll discuss the final two components to a media fast.

Lisa Engles uses several integrative healing techniques in her work as a certified life coach including EFT, music therapy and movement based healing arts.  She has a degree in Exercise Physiology and Kinesiolgy, and has spent many years in personal study of  consciousness and the new sciences.  She is available for private coaching as well as corporate presentations, workshops and seminars.  Email lisa@innerstatecoaching.com for more information.

Emotional Benefits of A Media Fast: Part 1

Last week I was driving and listening to NPR.  Since I don’t have a t.v., I take advantage of my drive time to listen to the news on the radio.  On this day in particular, I became acutely aware of how much time is spent in the news on the negative aspects of our countries economic state and that I’d become addicted to hearing about it.  At that moment I realized that I’m over it and that I need to make choices that keep me in an emotionally empowered state!  I’m tired of all of the focus on doom and gloom.  I’m sick of all the reports about how the economy is affecting peoples emotional health.  Of course it is!  But it sure doesn’t seem to help to listen to more stories about the failing stock market and bailout plans.  So I’ve decided to go on a media fast, and I’m officially inviting anyone else who wishes to join me.  

What is a media fast?  Simply put, it’s eliminating all media: news, radio and newpaper from your daily routine.  Think of it as a diet for your emotional well-being.  You’re getting rid of as much emotionally toxic information from your life as possible for a period of time in order to regain emotional balance, clarity and peace of mind.  

Why go on a media fast?  As I mentioned in the beginning of this post, the news is just as emotionally addictive to our minds as watching The Biggest Loser, Desperate Housewives, The Office or whatever your favorite show of choice is.  The difference is that more often than not, the news spends a majority of the time focusing on problems and what’s going wrong in our world.  When we buy into the bad news, it affects us emotionally.  When emotions such as fear, anxiety, and stress get linked to thoughts like “This is the worst recession since the Great Depression, and I’m losing all my money”, it creates neural networks in the brain which become programed beliefs.  

By eliminating media from our emotional diet so to speak, we open ourselves to the opportunity to see our lives from a different perspective.  Anytime I’m working with a client who is in a pattern of focusing on what’s not right in their life or believes that it’s impossible to change a situation I ask them “What if the opposite where true?”.  Just by asking that question, I break the doom and gloom spell.  

So if you’re ready to reset your perspective and regain emotional clarity and balance here’s how to begin your media fast:

1.  Eliminate All Media.  I suggest a 40-day fast, as this number is connected with ancient spiritual teachings and is believed to be both the number of testing oneself and the number which signifies revival and renewal.  Of course, any time period will do but to get the full benefit of this fast, try committing to at least 21-days of not watching the news, listening to news radio or reading the newspaper.  If you really want to test yourself, eliminate all t.v. (believe me, it’s worth it!).

2.  Eliminate Discussion About Economy and Finances.  During your fast, also commit to avoiding conversation about the economy or your personal finances with others.  It may be hard, and you may even catch yourself slipping here and there, especially during casual conversation.  The key here is to create awareness around what you’re choosing to focus your thoughts on.  

A media fast is a powerful practice.  In part 2 of this blog I’ll talk specifically about how to work with thoughts and beliefs that may come up for you during your fast.  

Lisa is available for private coaching as well as presentations, classes and workshops.  For more information, visit www.innerstatecoaching.com or email lisa@innerstatecoaching.com .

Money Can’t Buy Me Love

  I was in a hurry this morning, but that’s sort of normal… getting a 6 year old out of bed on a Tuesday morning to go to school isn’t always a smooth running operation.  Unfortunately, another normal occurence  for me is a car that breaks down.  Which is exactly what happened at 7:38 this morning as I was getting ready to start my day.

If I chose to, I could easily add this as yet another ‘thing’ to my list of all the reasons why I should be stressed out.  It might look something like this:  Income has decreased since last summer by 50%, Not enough money to pay all my bills without overdrawing every month, Taxes are due, Car broken again.  And this is just the cliff-notes version, I’m sparing the grim details.

So what’s a 21st century girl who’s been taught that she should be able to take care of herself, that she should be independent, strong and free of support from anyone else to do?  Well, if I held on to that belief, I can tell you that I’d be feeling pretty helpless, hopeless and guilty right now.  I’d also be giving myself a good beating of blame.  

I’ve found three simple ways to deal with my situation.

1. Connect With Close Friends.  This includes those people that I feel safe with and can trust and confide in.  Being connected with others is a part of human nature.  We need friendships and confidants that we know will understand, listen and offer support without judgement.  It’s important to recognize the difference between when a friend is truly empathizing or when they are giving advice.  When things are really tough, I’ve discovered that most people don’t want to be given a whole bunch of advice.  They want someone who will just listen to them and validate that what they’re experiencing is o.k.  Connecting in an authentic way allows you to release emotional conflict that otherwise would be stored in the body and could create illness and disease.

2.  Move My Body.  Movement is one of the best ways to release stress and anxiety.   In fact, during stressful times, exercise of any type will have a noticeable effect on your emotional state.  In my studies of movement based healing arts, we would have improvisational movement ‘play time’.  Working with whatever we were feeling, we would move our bodies to express the emotion.  The idea being that, through movement you can creatively release unresolved emotional conflict from the tissues of the body.  But you don’t have to be into the expressive arts to find benefit in moving your body.  Running, cycling, swimming, yoga, kickboxing, tai chi, walking, hiking, dancing …. you pick.  Just make the time to move your body in some way that feels good to you for at least 30 minutes per day.

3.  Express Gratitude.  Remember the lyrics from The Beatles: “…money can’t buy me love.” ?  That’s something that I’m so grateful for!  I hold with me throughout the day, the recognition of all the love I have in my life.  Money also can’t buy health, something else I’ve been blessed with.   Experts tell us that the expression of gratitude actually changes our biology.  When you focus on what you’re grateful for, all the things in your life that are going well, you open yourself to be more able to recognize opportunity.  During tough economic times, seeing what is good in our life helps us cope in a healthy way.  Gratitude can be expressed in a variety of ways.  You can keep a daily gratitude journal; You can express your appreciation for what others have done, or who they are;  You can write a thank you note to someone.

Connecting authentically with close friends, moving your body, and expressing gratitude are all healthy ways to channel stress and anxiety and will have a positive influence on your relationships and life during these tough economic times.

 

Lisa Engles uses Energy Psychology and Belief Coaching to help her clients move from barriers to breakthroughs in their body, health and life. Visit her website at: www.innerstatecoaching.com

Financial Anxiety Attack

  I’ve finally decided to surrender to what is… that is, the current state of my personal finances.  I know that my story isn’t  unique, that millions of Americans are experiencing the pressures of not being able to pay their mortgages, debts and daily living expenses.  But, after spending the last five months mentally and emotionally struggling with my beliefs about what I’ve been conditioned to think I ’should’ be doing to get my income back to where it was just last summer, I reached my bottom.  I didn’t have an anxiety attack or a nervous breakdown, but I sure wasn’t very fun to be around… even for myself!  In fact, I was starting to really dislike who I was becoming.  I wasn’t living in a state of being that was in alignment with my values.  I realized also that this isn’t just about me.  My experience is indicative of the collective experience, and that even if I were to change my thoughts and beliefs and use the Law of Attraction to change my situation (all of which I believe in and are a part of my work as a coach who uses energy psychology), the Universe has a different plan.  Maybe this is about letting everything fall apart, no matter how scary that is for me.  Maybe it’s time to consider that there may be a different paradigm for getting out of my financial crisis, that doesn’t include running around in a state of disarray and panic trying desperately to get a job that will provide for me.  Maybe it’s time for me to let go of  ideas and expectations that were born out of old dreams that no longer fulfill my deepest desires for how I want to live my life and be in service to the evolution of this planet.  So I’ve made the choice to release myself from all of the shame, blame and guilt around my finances… and have decided to consciously live in a state of gratitude because I have a precious gift, that money could never buy: my health and the health of my family.  

In upcoming posts I’ll talk about dealing with anxiety, fear and depression as we all are affected by these economic times.  You may also like to visit my website: www.innerstatecoaching.com for information about classes, workshops and private coaching sessions.